Whoa! Hold On a Second There, Cowbuddy!
By J. Lee Austin
Hard to believe it’s been over two years since we bid farewell to the dark piney thickets of east Texas and made the vertical move south to live on a peninsula with expansive sandy reaches, sparkling sea, warm people and horizons to infinity. It’s been a real grand slam, hail-Mary touchdown or blindfolded hole-in-one, depending on your ridiculous sports metaphor preference.
After three decades of playing the doctor game, which ended abruptly with my off-ramping at the scamdemic, a whole new career in writing was a welcome development. The presence of Substack has made that dramatically easier, with their friendly platform that nourishes creativity and encourages free speech. It’s not their fault if a monster is created. For the record I’m not a monster, but I did sleep at a Holiday Inn that one time.
It’s been a real thrill, what with 10 million paying subscribers spread across 12 Continents and all. Yeah I know, almost hard to believe. By the way, don’t believe anything you read on this boutique Substack. Or anywhere else for that matter. Wait, that can’t be right. Something has to be true somewhere, I’m sure of it.
Sometimes I hearken back to my days in medicine … and whenever I start missing the abundant stimulating human interaction of the profession, the great satisfaction of helping the docs with their patients, or the challenges of diagnosing cancer and other dread diseases, I ride my bike to the beach, inhale the salty breeze, and absorb the sights and sounds of the tumbling waves caressing the sand, and it’s all good. And when I hear the haunting call of a laughing gull I know I’m finally home. I just have to remember they’re laughing with me, not at me.
It’s a real joy to be hanging out with such a vibrant, big-hearted, community-minded bunch of beach bums. The co-operative togetherness of this place is a true model in altruistic behavior and an example of what I like to call the Good Help Network.
Our mission is to assist others in their endeavors, particularly those who help themselves and patriots who share our love of freedom and country. We will not help those who would take our freedom but will instead oppose them will all due vigor. Through loving co-operation, hard work and good clean fun, our ultimate goal is the safety and betterment of our fellow man and indeed ourselves.
People helping others who need it, nothing new about that of course. But with the increasingly sketchy state of our world, it seems more important than ever that we the locals come together everywhere. As anyone with eyes can see, it’s cloudy with a chance of meatballs and baloney, brought to you by the usual suspects cleverly named “public serpents” by the great Peggy Hall.
Parenthetically, in terms of saving humanity, I think the aliens may be our best bet … if they can somehow manage to see the potential in the human species. We have potential, I’m sure of it.
So yes, so-called retirement has been everything we had hoped and more. I can’t believe I get to write about this awesome place until I drift off into the sunset … floating peacefully, gently and quietly out to sea on a carefully crafted raft of reeds … hey wait, that’s not my story! And I’m not stickin’ to it!
The generosity here is exemplary and while history is full of it, this place is special. So many acts of kindness and selfless giving to others, everywhere you look. It’s been my pleasure and privilege to write about such wonderfuls as Mike and Bella, our very own surf shop Latitudes, sporting the cool attitudes. And Dean and Megan, the Jack Lalayne Sweat Fitness power lifting couple of Bolivar. Ok Doc, dating yourself now, try to be more current.
And what a frozen delight it was to report on Brett, Val and the other intrepid Survivor Rescue Trainees back in February during their final exam at the Jane Long bunkers, where it was colder than the wicked witch’s frosty bits.
This group of stalwart citizens deserve to be highly commended for persevering in such frigid conditions, and all of it for the benefit of their fellow man. That’s some serious Good Help right there, great job guys, many thanks again.
Speaking of good folks doing great things, I had coffee this week with Coast Guard Cap’n Currie, our local encyclopedic purveyor of all things Boating Safety. He has been teaching his important message with his weekly column on CrystalBeach.com, for nine years straight!
No telling how many lives he has saved with his informative essays. His recent article on duck hunting made me realize just how dumb/lucky I am to still be alive. Needless to say we were a few quacks shy of a quorum back then, safety wise. And probably otherwise, too.
I learned a lot from him during our little chat, with nuggets like, “You cannot swim against a 3 knot current.” Guess I’ll quit trying, lest I get swept off to Yucatan. My Spanish is way too rusty for such an outing.
That’s about it for today’s ramble, but if you would like full access to my non-expert, semi-informed analysis of relatively current events, mixed with assorted pathetic attempts at humor, come join our little community and subscribe for free at …
I can guarantee that it’s more fun than a barrel of drunk monkeys, not that I know anything about such matters. Anyhoo, here’s to all of us working together for peace, love and survival.
What say you, dear reader? I always look forward to hearing from you! ~~ j ~~
“Good judgement comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgement.” ~~ Will Rogers
